Alive
by Serena Kenobi
Summary: A loss of memory. A strange and dark savior. The galaxy's fate is forever changed. Post ESB AU. H/L.
1. Confusion

_**ALIVE**_

_**By Serena Kenobi**_

_**Rating: T**_

_**Summary: A loss of memory... a strange and dark savior... the galaxy's fate is forever changed. Post ESB AU. That's about all I can give without giving too much away. **_

_**Author's note: Other stories of mine will be updated. This is a plot bunny that wouldn't go away. I hope you enjoy. First posted on TheForce (dot) net's fanfic boards.**_

_**Disclaimer: If I owned Star Wars, then why would I be writing fanfiction?**_

* * *

_**Prologue **_

I heard screaming, and blood was dripping down my face and into my eyes as I awoke. I gasped for breath, but it wouldn't come. I coughed violently, and then I felt the air rush into my lungs. It hurt terribly, so much so that I lowered my head to the ground where I lay half on my stomach, half on my side. My legs felt funny, and so did my head. My head felt almost as if it was humming, and my ears were buzzing with sounds. I heard a crash and the ground that I was on rocked suddenly. My fingernails scraped into the steel floor as I tried to grab something – anything.

As I closed my eyes and tried to block out the chaos around me: the yelling people, the sparking machines, and the shaky ground. It didn't really work. I guessed it was time for me to try to get to my feet and see if I couldn't find out what was going on. I raised my head, ignoring the dark brown streaks of hair that were falling into my eyesight, and slowly lifted my upper body up into a more sitting position. Now fully able to turn my head all directions, I looked around at the mess I was in.

I was on a ship of some kind. It was badly damaged – at least, the part in which I was. There was nobody to be seen, but I heard yelling far off. Somebody was mad about something, or just in pain. I seemed to be in a cargo hold, maybe. I didn't know.

But then I realized something. Something very disturbing.

_Why didn't I know?_

That thought spiraled into more questions, and I came to a sudden conclusion.

I didn't know_anything. _

I banished all these thoughts from my mind as I decided to find the other people on board. They had to have answers, the answers that I needed. I shakily rose to my feet, but cried out as a sharp wave of pain hit me, and I sunk back down to the ground. The ship rocked again, and I was launched against a wall. I groaned and lay there for a moment. After I had caught my breath, I got down on my stomach and lifted myself up with my arms. I dragged my lower body along through the open, almost nonexistent door and peered out into the dark corridor.

_I'm scared of the dark, Daddy. _

I sucked in a breath of air and blinked. _What was that? _I paused, wondering if the moment or feeling would return, but it didn't. I glanced to both ends of the corridor, weighing my choices and seeing which one was the wisest direction to take. When I heard another cry from the right, I knew.

The pain in my body and especially my head was growing, and the buzzing noise in my ears was becoming louder, but I pressed on, not knowing where I was going or what I would find once I reached wherever I was going. After about ten minutes and fourteen crashes into the wall, I came to a doorway. I looked inside and gasped. There was a man lying on the floor. He seemed to be unconscious. I dragged myself into the room and turned him over on his back. There was much blood around him.

_He must've had some kind of accident, _I surmised. I felt for a pulse, and to my relief, there was one. I shoved him gently. "Sir? Sir, can you hear me?"

He didn't answer. The pulse was growing weaker, and to my alarm, so was I. It seemed that I would join him on the floor in a moment if I didn't get help.

"Sir, you need to wake up," I choked. "Please…" My arms were begging for relief as I struggled to stay upright. Tears began to soak into my eyes, and I suddenly screamed, "Somebody help me! I NEED HELP!"

Unexpectedly, there was the most vicious shudder, and I lost my balance and slumped to the ground. Then, the ship was calm. I heard some kind of strange noise from overhead, and I distantly realized that my head was bleeding again as a new trail of red liquid ran down my forehead and cheek. Then there was a clanking noise, but after that, silence.

I lay there on the floor for a moment, waiting, listening. The only noise I could hear was my own ragged breathing.

But then, I heard it. No, them. People. Footsteps. Boot steps, more like, but that meant help.

_I'm being rescued!_

I tried to scream, but my voice seemed unable to work for some odd reason. I think my lungs were deprived of air, or they were damaged. I couldn't get anything out except for a hoarse whisper. "In here," I breathed as my eyes flitted shut for a second and then reopened.

Then… something happened. I couldn't explain it. I heard things… felt things…_sensed _things.

Someone was coming. Coming for me.

_I'm here! _My mind screamed for my voice. _I'm in here!_

I felt surprise, shock, and some kind of darker emotion that made me shudder with fear from the other being with whom I was connected. That dark feeling caused me to close my mind, and I turned my head into my arm, wanting to block out what I had just felt.

Then came the footsteps. Closer, closer. _Thump, thump, thump. _There were many of them.

Whoever they were.

I listened and turned my head towards the doorway, but I was too tired to move anything else. I was barely staying awake. My eyes began to darken, and my vision began swimming…

I barely registered a dark shadow falling over me, but I couldn't lift my head to see whom it was. There was a voice, an odd voice saying something, but I couldn't reply or hear much.

"Lord Vader… found… injured… medical …"

One of the last things I heard was a strange noise coming from above me. It sounded like a whirring… or a wheezing… Then, someone else spoke. "This must… Princess… take… star destroyer…"

As the noises became muddled together and my eyes darkened, I whispered, "Who am I?"

I drifted away into darkness.

* * *

_**That's the first chapter. Free Yoda plushies (if you like Yoda, which I don't) to whomever guesses the narrator's identity. **_

_**MtFbwy,**_

_**- Serena Kenobi **_


	2. Awake

**ALIVE**

**By Serena Kenobi**

**A/N: Wow, thanks for the feedback! The identity of the unknown character is revealed here. **

**Disc: One is enough in the first chapter. It applies to this whole story. Why repeat myself? **

* * *

  
Everything was white. White, shining, and very, very bright. I kept my eyes closed, but the light was shining through my heavy lids, and I squeezed my eyes shut and groaned. After a few moments, I slowly opened them and blinked once, twice. I was in some kind of room, and I was lying on my back on something firm. There was beeping and noises of all different kinds, but I didn't hear any voices.

I craned my head to look down and around, but I saw no one. Testing my hands and arms, I moved them slightly. They seemed to work fine. I pushed myself upright and looked at the white blanket that had been covering me. I was wearing some kind of white shift, and my hair, which I pulled forward to look at, was very long and brown. But it was clean, not covered in sweat and blood and pieces of metal like before.

"Ah, she awakes," came a disdainful, somewhat menacing voice.

My head bolted up, and I saw a man, an older man in a medical coat worn over some kind of olive-colored uniform. In his hand was a strange looking tool… that was sharp and very dangerous looking. His weathered face was cringed up into an almost evil expression, and his beady blue eyes bored into mine. My breath caught, and my heart raced with fear and horror. I did the only thing I could think of at the time.

I screamed.

The man's face turned surprised, then faded quickly into angry, and he took a looming step towards my bed. I screamed again, this time louder and repeatedly, and I scrambled off the medical bed and crawled away. _I have to get out of here! _My mind chanted. _He's going to hurt me! Torture me! _

"Shut up, you Rebel scum!" He shouted, his face contorting into a more disgusted expression.

I gasped and screamed, "GET AWAY FROM ME!" And I dragged myself, ignoring the shooting pain driving up my legs and arms and into my head, up against the corner farthest from him. I curled up into a ball, my back against the wall, and wrapped my arms around my knees. "Just… St-stay away fr-from m-me!" I stuttered, my eyes wide.

I heard a whooshing noise, and the oddest, most intimidating creature – figure – I'd ever seen striding up beside the man and looking from him to me. There was a loud noise coming from the form – it sounded like breathing.

"Is there a problem, Doctor?" The creature boomed. I shuddered and drew closer to myself.

The man, obviously the Doctor, leered at me. "She's just a scared little girl," he sneered disdainfully. "Pitiful to see the Rebels lowered to this. She's a whiny thing. Shall I begin the interrogation, Milord?"

"In-interrogation?" I squawked.

The black, tall form looked at me – at least, I think it – he – was looking at me. I don't know how I knew, because he was wearing a helmet, but I just knew. I sensed it, maybe.

"Care to get off the floor, Your Highness?" He rumbled.

I stared at him. "Y-Your Highness?" I stammered. _What is he talking about?_ "What are you t-talking about?"

The Doctor snorted. "Nice try, missy. But you can't pull that innocent little act with us."

The creature looked at him, and he fell silent. Then the creature turned back to me. He seemed to be thinking about something. "What is your name?" He asked finally.

I opened my mouth to speak, but the words, whatever they were, died on my lips. It was then that I realized not only did I not know where I was or what was going on…

I didn't know _who_I was.

My breathing increased at that horrifying revelation, and I gazed up at him fearfully. "I…. I don't know," I whispered, terrified. "_I don't know_!" My hands started shaking, and then my body followed. "I don't know…"

"Do you know who I am?" The intimidating figure questioned.

I shook my head. "No," I said. "I don't know. I don't know who you are." I gazed up at him, wondering if he intended to hurt me.

The creature stood silent for a moment, and then he said in a more gentle voice, if that was possible, "Do not panic. No one will harm you here."

The Doctor looked at him incredulously, and I heard him whisper, "My lord? What are you doing?"

The creature turned on him sharply and hissed, "Rest assured I know what I am doing. I suggest you stay out of this if you value your well-being." I glanced at the Doctor suspiciously as he glared at me.

"But sir, she's the-"

The creature brought up a fist, and he fell silent and murmured, "Yes sir." Then, he rushed out of the room, but not before shooting me a dark look. I shivered and looked at the dark, imposing creature.

"Who-who are you?" I asked.

The figure stepped towards me, and I pulled back. "St-stay back," I whimpered.

"I will not hurt you, young one," the shape said slowly. He held out a black-gloved hand. "I am…" He was silent for a moment. "Vader," he said. "I am Lord Darth Vader."

I frowned for a split second. _Had I heard that name before? _But the moment passed, and I dismissed it as being from my imagination. "Are you going to kill me?" I asked.

"No," he said simply. "Take my hand, young one. No one will hurt you."

I glanced at his outstretched hand warily. "Why should I trust you?" I inquired. "Maybe you're lying."

"Search your feelings," Vader pressed. "You know I will not hurt you."

I somehow just knew he was right. But why was it that I felt an undertone of danger? Maybe that was my imagination, too. I looked from his helmet to his hand and slowly, cautiously, reached out my hand and took his. His was much, much larger, and it wrapped around mine in a firm grip. Not hard, but firm. I tried to get up, taking my other hand and placing it against the cold wall for balance, but my legs gave way and I cried out suddenly in pain and slumped back to the ground. He caught me and lifted me into his arms.

"Your legs are grievously injured," he said sternly. "I suggest you do not walk for at least three weeks."

"Three weeks?" I exclaimed.

His mask gazed into mine, and I blushed. "Do you have some pressing appointment?" He rumbled.

I shook my head, ashamed. "No." I looked at my legs as we walked out of the med-bay. "What's wrong with my legs?"

"They were injured during your crash."

"My crash?" I echoed.

"Yes."

This was a lot of information, and I told him so myself. "But why was I on a ship? What kind of ship? Who were my crewmates? Do you know who I am?" I needed answers, and he might be just the one to give them to me.

"One question at a time, young one," he chided. "First I will take you to your quarters, which is where you will stay for the remainder of our journey."

"And then?" I pressed.

He said, but sounded rather hesitant, "Once we reach Imperial City I must decide what to do with you. You are a rather… peculiar situation."

We stopped in front of a steel door that opened by itself. I blinked, but forgot quickly about it as we entered dark quarters, lit only by starlight from the many windows. He laid me down on the bed, which was somewhat bland-looking, and stepped back. "You need your rest," he told me. "After you recover, I suggest you pick out a name for yourself." He went over to the computer, tapped on the keyboard for a second, and disconnected a datapad. He handed it to me and said, "Here is a list of female names. Now, I must leave. I will send a droid for you to keep you company and see to your needs."

"Thank you," I whispered. "You don't have to do this. I can never repay your compassion."

There came from him an odd noise, almost a strangling sound, and he started to stride out of the room.

Feeling a sudden burst of fear at the thought of being alone again, my hand flashed out and grabbed his. "Don't leave me," I pleaded. He stopped still. "I… I don't want to be alone again." Being alone was a very unpleasant concept, and I felt tears coming up into my eyes again.

Vader stared down at my hand in his and said quietly, "You will not be alone, young one." He let go and began to walk away.

"Wait!" I cried. ""Do you know who I am?" A spasm of internal pain hit me, and I shuddered from the lack of knowledge.

He paused, stood there for a second, and said shortly, "No." He turned and stormed out of the room.

* * *

**AH HA! For those of you who guessed Leia, free... uh, R2 plushies to you! And I know everyone loves Artoo. Or they should. **

**- Serena **


	3. Aisha

**ALIVE**

**By Serena Kenobi**

**A/N: Yes, I haven't updated in AGES! Apologies, apologies! I hope you guys like this chapter, though. We'll be getting to Han and Luke in a few chapters. ENJOY!**

* * *

_Anakin! Anakin! NO! _

_Stop! Come back! I love you!_

_You turned her against me!_

_You were my brother, Anakin!_

I bolted upright, my chest heaving. My body was covered in sweat, and the sheets were tangled around me. The starlight only lighted the room, and as my breathing became normal, I rolled over and pulled myself to the edge of the bed and leaned over. What had happened? What did I see? Who was talking? Was it just a dream? Was it memories of my past? And who was Anakin?

I shook my head, sighed, and rubbed my eyes as I stood up slowly, shakily, only to fall back with a cry onto the bed. "Shavit!" I cursed. I paused. Where did I learn that word?

This was driving me insane. I needed to think about something else. I glanced to the nightstand and realized that I had forgotten to name myself. I shuddered and took the datapad up in my hand. I didn't know my own name. That was terrifying. I sucked in a breath and flicked on the datapad and began scrolling down the list of names. Eventually, I came up with a few particular ones that had caught my eye. But I wasn't sure which one to choose. I'd ask Vader.

But first, I needed a shower. I looked around for a 'fresher and decided that the open doorway to the right of the bed on the other side of the room must be the 'fresher. I knew that I couldn't walk on my own, so I knelt down, holding in another cry of pain, and dragged myself into the 'fresher. Once inside, I pulled myself up to the sink, flicked on the lights, and, still looking down at the sink, mentally prepared myself. I would be looking into my face for the first time since I had lost my memories. Maybe I would remember something when I saw myself. Would I be disappointed? Was I pretty? My eyes climbed their way up to the mirror, and I stared at myself.

Kriff, I looked _terrible. _My face was pale – too pale, I think – and bruised around the upper cheekbones. To accentuate this fine make-up, dark patches of skin that revealed how exhausted I was encircled my confused, plain brown eyes. I leaned forward and touched my face. I had brown eyes. Plain brown hair, too. I reached up and felt my hair that was currently a disaster in a messy braided bun. I made a disgusted face, then a smile, then I raised my eyebrows to see how I looked in the different positions. I reached up and pulled my hair, which to my surprise was extremely long, down and out from the ruined braid. It fell to my waist and was thick. I didn't like it that long.

After I took a long shower that made me feel warm and _so _much better, I fished around the cabinet for scissors or something along those lines to cut my hair. I found a pair and then thought about how long I wanted to keep it. Deciding that I'd make it touch my shoulders, I cut it off.

Afterwards, I managed to crawl back into the bedroom, where I searched for clothing. I could only find dark grey pants that were too big and a plain grey tunic, but it was better than the shift I'd been wearing.

"Are you feeling better?"

I turned to see Vader standing in the doorway. I smiled faintly and nodded. "Yes, thank you." I began to pull myself back onto the bed, and I was grateful when he came up behind me and helped to do so.

"You should not strain yourself," he said.

"I know," I said shamelessly, "but I needed a shower." I ran a hand over my wet hair.

He stared at me for a minute. "You cut your hair?" He sounded incredulous.

I nodded uncertainly. "Yeah. It was too long. I don't know why I let it grow like this, but I like it a lot better now that it's shorter." Tired from the crawl to and from the 'fresher, I rubbed my sore, aching legs. "I have some names," I said rather shyly. "Do you want to hear them?"

"Very well."

"Okay," I said. "My choices are…" I grabbed the datapad. "Aisha… Sabe… and Leia and Padmé." I looked up at him and was astonished to find that he had frozen, and his breathing had stopped. "Vader? Are you all right?"

His breathing began again slowly. "What is your… your final choice?" He eventually asked, although it seemed hard for him to speak.

I shrugged, blushing. "I don't know. I'm leaning towards Leia, but…" Without a second's notice, I found a sudden rush of emotions burst into me: love, hate, rage, grief – but just as soon as it had come, it flashed by. I put a hand to my head. "What… what was that?" I whispered.

Vader came closer. "What is it?"

"I… I don't know."

He stood by me for a moment until I shook my head.

"I've chosen," I told him suddenly. He tensed.

"Aisha," I said. "My name is Aisha."

Vader looked at me through his visors for an extended pause. "Do you know what that name means?"

I shook my head. "No. What?"

"It means… alive."

* * *

**THIRD PERSON POV**

Admiral Piett was a loyal servant of the Empire. He always had been. He served Lord Vader primarily, and then the Empire and Emperor second. He knew that was most likely treasonous, but he felt that it was his obligation, his moral code to serve his commander and crew before anyone else. He would support Lord Vader's decisions, whatever they were, and follow the Dark Lord dutifully.

"Admiral." A young lieutenant handed him a datapad. "The smugglers on Ord Mandell have left the area, but we've managed to acquire some additional data on the Rebels."

"Good, Lieutenant. Dismissed."

The lieutenant bowed shortly and left the bridge.

Piett turned back to gazing at the stars. This was more of Vader's forte, but he found that he enjoyed it. It gave him a chance to think. Normally, he would think about how he could perform his duty in a more impressive and well-timed manner, but today he was thinking of the Rebel Princess. His crew had found her ship battered, her crew all dead and mortally injured, all except for her. She herself had been on the brink of death, and despite her still living, she still suffered severe leg injuries. She would not walk well for at least another week. But that was not what had his mind running with questions. The girl, despite being a Rebel leader, was a brave one. She had courage and loyalty to her beliefs, and he respected that. But now… she had lost her memories. She must've been injured badly in the attack on her ship, most likely from pirates, and now she suffered from amnesia. Ordinarily, it wouldn't have captured his thoughts in this way, but something about the Princess's situation he pitied. The girl was, after all, only a little over twenty years old, and she had been through so much.

Well, enough musing. It was time to return to duty. He turned and went to one of the command stations and demanded an update of the searches his crew was running.

"Ensign, I want an update of the Baji sector. How are we faring with the pirating control there?" Piett didn't even listen for an answer as he straightened and paled, staring at the two figures that had just entered the bridge.

Lord Vader was coming towards him, decked in all the intimidating black armor that never left his body unless in a special chamber. But Vader's gait was not that of his normal one. He was not striding purposefully towards Piett; he was going slowly, carefully.

Piett barely looked at him. A very small, slouched female figure was clinging for dear life to the Dark Lord's right arm. It appeared she was using Vader for support, and her body was trembling. Her eyes, which were darting around curiously, had dark circles around them and were so lifeless and dull that they astounded Piett. This girl was very different from the strong, proud Rebel Princess from before.

He couldn't help but become more concerned and shocked when Vader came up to him and said in his normal booming voice, "Admiral Piett. This is Aisha."

Piett took one long look at the worn, broken form of the former Rebel Princess, and knew that what they were doing was horribly wrong.

* * *

**Piett's got a heart! I've always liked Piett, and I think you can tell that if you've read my "I Am Me" series. I just don't like to portray him in a bad light, and I never will. Hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

**MtFbwy,**

**- Serena**


	4. Stars

**ALIVE**

By Serena Kenobi

A/N: Okay, I haven't updated in a while... but writing a 140 page novel (and it's only halfway done) has been taking up most of my time. Here's the next chapter!

* * *

I studied the man in front of me, Admiral Piett, Vader told me, and decided that he seemed to be a decent man. I didn't remember any men other than Vader – was he even human? – but I got the impression that Piett wouldn't do me any harm.

"Miss," Piett bowed as Vader introduced me. I didn't know why, but I caught something disturbed in his eyes. Why was he looking at me that way?

"Admiral," I said softly, nodding at him. I was still wary of my surroundings and instinctively tightened my grip on Vader. Also, my legs were aching again.

"This is the bridge, Aisha," Vader rumbled, motioning to the space before him with his free hand. "You are welcome to come here when your legs have recovered."

I nodded, but my eyes were fixed on the large windows that surrounded the bridge. "Stars," I breathed, and moved forward hesitantly. Vader helped me along until I was standing right in front of the largest window. I reached out and touched the glass. "They're beautiful," I murmured.

"Indeed," Vader said. I somehow got the feeling that something was disturbing him now as well. "But they eventually die. Even stars die," he added solemnly, almost as an afterthought. I wondered at his bitter tone.

"Then you should enjoy them while they're there, right?" I said, looking up at him.

He looked down at me. "Perhaps. Or maybe it is a waste of time and effort."

"No it's not," I frowned. What had made him so bitter? I shook my head. I had too many questions, and my legs were hurting terribly as was my head. "I think I need to sit down now," I said faintly.

He quickly turned and nodded. "Of course. I'll have someone escort you back to your room."

"What are you going to do?" I inquired curiously.

"Attend to some… business," was his cryptic answer. When I frowned, he added, "I will explain later." He motioned a young man to come to us. "Private, escort the Lady Aisha to her quarters."

The Private nodded. "Yes, my Lord." He held out an arm, but I noticed that it was stiff, and his eyes were glaring daggers into mine. "Let's go."

I wondered at his hostile tone but didn't comment. Turning to face Vader again, I said, "Will I see you soon?"

He nodded. "Yes."

I nodded back, grateful. So far, he was the only one I trusted. "Thank you," I murmured, and allowed myself to be led away by the young man. But a small part of me was still disturbed by the… darkness that seemed to surround him. I shook my head. I was going insane.

* * *

**THIRD PERSON POV**

"Well, Dr. Wyax?" Vader said calmly as he entered the Medical Center. "How is our patient?"

"She'll be fine soon enough," The Dr. Wyax grumbled. "Her legs took quite a beating, but they'll be operational in around three weeks as you said."

"And her other condition?"

"Ah, yes, the amnesia. Well, unless her memory is trigged by something on a large scale, I don't think she'll recover her memory. If she meets another person, perhaps a friend of hers, then she might remember, but other than that… it looks permanent. But it's hard to tell."

Vader nodded. "Good. She may yet be of some use to us."

"There's, ah, another thing I forgot to mention," Wyax said, moving over to a console. "The Princess is adopted."

Vader hadn't known that. "Adopted?"

"Yes. I ran a DNA test on a side thought and came up with some fascinating news. Her parents are none other than legendary Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker and Senator Padmé Amidala."

Vader certainly hadn't expected that. "_What_?" He hissed.

"Yes, I was as surprised as you – but I suppose that it's natural – the brat takes after her mother – Rebel scum-" Wyax suddenly found himself thrown up against the wall, the Dark Lord's hand squeezing his neck tightly.

"Do not… talk of her that way," Vader seethed, and promptly killed him. The Doctor dropped to the floor, dead. Vader stepped back, inwardly reeling. His daughter… Leia was _his _daughter! _Their _daughter!

"Padmé…" he murmured.

* * *

I wasn't sure how, but I just _sensed_, or it was more of a gut feeling, I guess, that the man escorting me to my room hated me. I was extremely uncomfortable, especially having to rely on his weight to continue walking, and even more so because he was walking quickly – too quickly for me. "Could we slow down, please?" I asked as the pain shot up my legs. I had to bite back a scream.

He just snorted. "What's the matter, _Princess? _Can't you do it on yourself?"

"Princess?" I echoed. _Did someone else call me that before? _I frowned, wracking my brain for memories…

"_Don't get all mushy on me – so long, Princess." _

"W-what?" I stammered, my face suddenly turning red as I halted. That voice… that tone… it was _so familiar! _Was I finally regaining my past? But to my sorrow, the feelings and the voice brushed by and faded into the dark corners of my mind, gone just as soon as they had come. I bit my lip to keep from crying. _No! _My mind cried. _Come back! _

"Hey!" The man escorted me jerked sharply on my arm, almost pulling it out of its socket, and I stumbled forward – my legs gave out, and I dropped to the ground with a whimper.

"Get up!" he growled, prodding me.

"I can't!" I hissed through clenched teeth.

He snorted again and prodded me harder. "What a pathetic sight this is. Why don't you just die?" He said disdainfully.

I turned my head to stare up at him bitterly. "Why do you hate me?" I asked drearily, my vision beginning to swim from the pain in my legs. I was beginning to feel something warm under my fingers, and I barely registered that it was blood. Why wasn't anyone helping me from this madman?

"You killed my brother," he hissed in my face. To my horror, I saw his hands descending towards my neck. Before I could move, however, the hands wrapped around my throat and began squeezing it, hard. I choked and brought my bloodied hands up to try and pry them off, but in my condition, he was much stronger. I felt the life being drained out of me –

But without warning, a downpour of emotions splashed onto me: anger, rage, fury, indignation – and before I could realize what happened, the man's hands had been pried off me, and he was thrown into the wall violently. I coughed, blinking drowsily, and lay there on the floor, trying to figure out what had just happened.

I heard a sudden inhuman roar, and as my sight dimmed, I caught sight of a familiar tall, dark figure holding up the man against the wall. I heard a sickening snap, and the dark shape tossed the lifeless man to the floor. Then, the figure advanced towards me. But as it – he – grew closer, I saw not dark armor and a long black cloak, but a black-clothed, dark robed young man. His intense blue eyes were the last things I saw before I fell unconscious.

* * *

So... there's that. ENJOY!

MtFbwy,

- Serena


	5. Gon

ALIVE

By Serena

A/N: Okay, here's the next chapter. I already have the next few chapters written, so they'll be updated quicker than usual. Thanks for the comments, everyone! Most appreciated.

* * *

"What do you mean, she's missing?"

"Captain, Princess Leia left to help with your rescue but never arrived."

"Yeah," a recently freed Han Solo said irritably, "We know that. We thought she might've stayed for some reason on the ship."

Luke shook his head. "No, she was on her way. You know Leia would be there to rescue you. She was a strategic part of the plan."

Han sighed. "Go on, General," he said to the hologram in front of him.

"Very well, sir. We got a distress signal from Her Highness's ship, but by the time our ships reached the coordinates, the ship was gone."

Han and Luke exchanged deeply concerned glances; and Han rose to his feet from the late Obi-Wan Kenobi's table and began to pace the hut of the deceased Jedi in an agitated manner. "Leia can take care of herself," the former smuggler said, though Luke knew it was a futile attempt to reassure both himself and Luke.

For himself, Luke was extremely worried. She was one of his closest friends, and for some inexplicable reason, he felt a deeper bond with her than Han. It wasn't romantic by far any longer – he knew how Han and Leia felt about each other and couldn't be more pleased with their relationship – whatever that was. But now that Leia was missing…

"Sirs, a ship came more recently came to the vicinity of the Princess's vessel, and I think it's safe to say that the Princess was captured."

"Track the ship's ion trail," Han barked.

"Already on it, General. But the ship went to lightspeed shortly after, so we'll start looking at nearby planets." The hologram died away.

Han turned to Luke. "You think it's the Empire?"

Luke sighed. "I don't know. I hope not." He glanced out the window. "I just hope she's all right."

Han nodded grimly. "Yeah, me too."

* * *

_Young one… wake up. _

_I couldn't open my eyes… it was too painful. A warm hand passed over my head, and I inhaled deeply. The scent of roses was in the air, and a warm breeze blew past me. Slowly, I opened my eyes. Kneeling over me was an older man with the kindest face I'd ever seen. He had long blonde hair and a short beard and was draped in a dark brown cloak. His eyes were a warm blue. _

"_Good morning, young one." _

"_What? Where am I?" I murmured._

"_In a dream… this is Naboo." He swept a hand across to show me the gorgeous landscape, then held it out to help me to my feet. To my surprise, my legs were perfectly fine. _

"_Who are you? What's going on?" I asked, slightly disturbed. He merely smiled a warm smile. _

"_You may call me… Gon." _

"_Gon?" _

"_Yes. I've been watching you for a long time, young one. I've come to help you. I know you're alone and confused, and I've come to guide your through your new journey."_

"_Journey? I don't understand," I said blankly. Frowning, I asked, "Do you know who I am? Who I was?"_

_He slowly shook his head. "No. But I will help you rediscover your past… and help you for your future. There are many things you must know, young one. I will be watching you and guiding you in your dreams." Everything became muddled, and the last thing I heard was his whisper, "I will be watching over you…" _

_I blinked, an in an abrupt flash, I found myself standing on a molten rock, looking down into a fiery river of lava. To my horror, a young man was lying stomach down on the hill near the river. I felt ashy smoke filling my lungs, and I found that I couldn't breathe. But my gaze was locked onto the young man. Transfixed, his eyes rose to meet mine… _

_I had seen the young man before! I found myself remembering their azure intensity before… But as our gazes met, my heart jumped in horror. _

_They were not human eyes. A mix of yellow, red, and orange, and filled with a lusty rage and a darker fury than I had ever seen before. I felt that I was being smoldered by his hate-filled vision that locked onto me. His lips parted into a snarl, and his eyes lit with a deadly fire. _

_My lungs found their breath, and I screamed. _

"Aisha!"

My eyes flew open, and choking, I tried to breathe. But it was an excruciatingly painful process, one that had me coughing the next moment as my hand flew up to my bruised and sore throat. My eyes welled up with tears, and two slipped down my face. Blinking rapidly, I saw Vader hovering over me. I couldn't tell if he was concerned or not – his mask was unreadable.

"Vader?" I whispered hoarsely.

"You were having a nightmare," he stated.

I nodded slowly. "What… happened?"

"A… gravely mistaken officer who believed you to be someone else. He has been corrected." I shivered at his dark tone, wondering distantly exactly how the man had been "corrected." But Vader wouldn't hurt anyone, would he?

Suddenly, I felt a wave of concern, but it wasn't mine. I frowned, and somehow reached out to the feeling. I felt a touch of incredulity, then coldness. I pulled back and stared at Vader. _What's going on? _I mentally wondered.

_You are strong indeed, young one. _

My eyes widened. Someone else had called me that, but this voice sounded like… Vader! _Is that you, Lord Vader? _I asked cautiously.

_Yes. _

_How am I doing this? _

There was a pause, then, _It is the Force, L- Aisha. _

Now I paused. I had caught a hint of something else, before he said my name. But I dismissed it quickly and continued, _What's the Force? _

_Not now, young one. Now you need to rest. We have much to discuss when you are better. Sleep. _

My eyes drifted shut, but the last thing I remembered seeing hovering over me before the darkness closed in on me again was not Lord Vader.

A darkly cloaked young man with intense blue eyes was gazing warmly down at me.

* * *

The next morning I awoke to perfect silence. Vader was gone, and I was alone. Rubbing my still sore neck, I slid my legs off the bed, intending to feel the instant pain as I put pressure on them, but as soon as my feet touched the ground, I gasped. I felt hardly any pain at all. Timidly, I put more and more pressure on my shaking legs until I was standing fully upright. Though able to feel a tinge of pain, I could actually stand without falling to the ground.

_What happened? _I thought. _Vader said I wouldn't heal for two weeks, and it's been less than a week. Maybe he did something? _I wasn't sure.

Hesitantly, still uncertain how long my legs would hold, I began to limp slowly to the doorway. I still felt some aching pain, but it wasn't nearly as bad as before – I could walk. It was a liberating feeling, and I felt a wave of triumph and hope overcome me as I touched the doorjamb and entered the living area of my quarters. Sitting down on the sofa, I inhaled and exhaled, both weary and, for the first time in my new existence, happy.

Maybe, just maybe, I could restart my life. Maybe I could begin a new course, travel down a new path. I wanted to learn as much as I could about everything – the galaxy, the status of the government, Vader. If he hadn't been around to help me, I probably would've died.

But for some reason, a slightly nagging feeling lingered in my mind, and I began to wonder if Vader was holding something back still. I wasn't sure, but something was telling me that everything wasn't all right. Shaking it off as just nerves, I decided to firmly put my trust in Vader and hope that he had the best intentions towards me.

A small part of my mind, however, told me that I wasn't one to easily trust.

* * *

After a half hour of restlessly searching the quarters for anything to read or do, I finally managed to find a holoproj. Flipping it on, I realized that it'd been already programmed to some news station. A finely dressed human woman was talking about something… someone, rather.

"And it appears that Jabba the Hutt has been murdered by the Rebellion insurgents. The planet of Tatooine will be devastated by this loss."

I frowned. Who was Jabba the Hutt? Why was he murdered? Well, fine, he was hideous, as the picture on the screen showed clearly, but why? And who were Rebellion insurgents? Some kind of terrorist group?

"Aisha!"

I looked up, startled, to see Lord Vader standing in the doorway. Without any explanation, he moved forward and suddenly shut off the holoproj. I grew instantly alarmed as I somehow felt his irritation and… was that worry? "Vader?" I said hesitantly. "What's the matter?"

"Where did you get this?" He thundered, causing me to curl deeper and father back into the couch to escape his wrath.

"I… I found it." My eyes slowly narrowed. _What is he so angry for? What did I do wrong? _

"Where?" he demanded.

Finding myself growing slightly irritated myself at his fury, I said in a more bold voice, "In here. I was bored and tired and had nothing else to do. Is there a problem?"

He was silent for a moment, almost as if he was unsure of what to say next, but he finally said tersely, "You should not have done that. Your condition is… delicate. I will not have you putting more stress on yourself."

"How is watching the news stressing?" I asked. "I need to know what's going on out there. Whatever my condition is, I'm going to find out eventually. You don't intend to keep me here, on this ship forever, do you?" I stared at him with wide eyes.

His fists clenched. "Aisha… there are people out there. People who could hurt you. I'm trying to protect you."

His last words, for some odd reason, brought an unpleasant taste in my mouth – it was almost as if I had heard those words from him before… Shaking my head, I said, "Protect me from what? People like the officer who attacked me?" I swallowed painfully, not wishing to remember that unpleasant episode.

"Yes," he affirmed. "You are a vulnerable young woman, Aisha. And that is why you must stay here while I show you how to protect yourself."

"How?" I asked curiously.

He held out a hand. "Come with me."

Vader led me through various passageways until we entered a dark room. At a wave of his hand, dim lights flickered on, and he brought me to the middle of the room. It was mostly bare except for a few droids powered down by the wall and gleaming rounded stick-looking things hanging above them. I glanced at Vader's belt. "Is that some kind of weapon?" I asked.

He took the thing off his belt and handed it to me. I didn't know why, but a sudden rush came over me, and I nearly gasped. I felt so… powerful! It was amazing. "This is more than a weapon," he said calmly. "It is the heart of the Force."

"The Force… you mentioned that earlier," I murmured as I turned the weapon over in my hands.

"Indeed," he rumbled. "And starting today, we will begin your training."

Vader had me sit in the middle of the room with my eyes closed. He then shut off the lights and said, "Now, Aisha, I want you tell me what you are feeling."

I stiffened. The dark I did not like – it brought back painful memories of my rebirth on the crash of the ship. I guessed that I had been scared of the dark from a young age, and it didn't seem to be going away now. "Annoyed," I said, not wanting to show weakness.

After a pause, he said, "Not what you're thinking. What you are _feeling._"

I sighed. "Frightened. Anxious."

"Why?"

"I don't like the dark," I admitted. "I don't think I ever did."

He seemed to digest this information before saying, "If you are to become one with the Force, to control it, you must conquer your fear. It is the only way."

"What is the Force?"

"It is an energy field that is in all living things. It binds the galaxy together. It is the power of the Sith and the…" he halted. "It is the power of the Sith."

"Who are the Sith?"

I heard an odd sound from him – maybe it was laughter. "You ask too many questions, young one. One thing at a time. Right now, I want you to focus. Focus on your emotions. Let other emotions dominate your fear. You must conquer it."

I sighed – this would be harder than I thought. But I kept my eyes closed and immersed myself into my emotions. I felt suddenly dizzy and disoriented, but I could sense in great detail everything in and around the room. Almost as if in a dream, I searched out my emotions and concentrated on my fear. It suddenly came rushing up on me, and I could once again hear the screams of terror and agony on the ship – I could feel the blood running down my face and the excruciating pain in my lifeless legs as I crawled down the corridor of the ruined, battered ship. All at once I felt anxiety and panic pour into my senses, and I began breathing faster –

"Control your fear."

It was Vader.

I tried to slow my racing heart, but I couldn't. I could _feel _the darkness and despair welling up in me… _I can't do this! _I screamed inwardly. _Vader! _

_Conquer your fear! You must do this! _Vader's cold command was of no comfort or support to me, and I began to hyperventilate as the chilling darkness slithered toward me – But without warning, a golden light entered my confused, frightened mind, and I could see something – or _someone _– entering my mind's vision. The darkness cowered and shuddered as the light shone upon it, and a golden sword flashed in the darkness. The dark shrieked and withered away until it was fully gone from me. I felt my heartbeat slowing down already as I looked at the light in wonder.

_Calm yourself, young one. _

That voice! That warm, kind, comforting voice! I knew that voice! As I focused on the light, it bent and shaped into a familiar figure, one I had seen in my dreams…

_Let go of your fear, young one. Come into the light. Become one with the Force. _

_I – I don't know how, _I said hesitantly.

A larger hand reached out to me. _Take my hand, young one. There is nothing to fear. I am here. I am watching over you. _

There was nothing else I could do. I took the warm, gentle hand with my pale, much smaller one. Immediately I felt a rush of peace and calmness as the golden light enveloped my whole body. I could breathe easier again.

_Remember, young one, _he said, smiling kindly down on me. _The Force will be with you. Always. _

My brow furrowed. _But what about you? _

But his hand drifted into nothingness, and the light flickered. I shivered instinctively as I was left in my mind alone once more, but I wasn't as afraid as before. He had given me comfort. I wasn't alone anymore.

I was jolted out of my concentration by two strong hands gripping my shoulders, and my eyes snapped open. Instantly I felt a wave, a furious rush of emotions - anger, betrayal, rage – I stared up at Vader, who I _knew _was angrier than I'd seen him before.

"How," he snarled viciously, "Did you _do _that?"

* * *

**So, Vadey doesn't seem to be very happy right now. Eh, he'll get over it. Maybe..**

Reviews are appreciated as always! Thanks for reading!

- Serena


	6. Memory

**ALIVE**

**By Serena**

**A/N:** _Thanks to all of my wonderful readers!!! You guys are the awesomest. How's that grammar for ya? ;D _

* * *

"W-what?" I stammered, trying to pull back from his overly tight grasp.

"I felt it – you were using the Force in a way that no _amateur _could ever hope to accomplish! You have lied – who trained you?"

I winced as his hands tightened ruthlessly. "Let go," I gasped. "Let go, please." I froze as I suddenly heard voices in the back of my head – one of them sounding eerily like me…

_Don't get excited! _

_Captain, being held by you isn't quite enough to get me excited. _

_Sorry, sweetheart. Haven't got time for anything else. _

I cringed, my eyes screwing shut. "Stop it," I hissed. "I can't… I can't _do _this anymore!" I stared back up at Vader, who was gazing at me, and felt a sudden wave of resentment and anger. "Release me," I ordered coldly.

But he didn't. "What did you see?" he demanded.

"I don't know!" I cried. "I _don't know!"_ I could feel tears beginning to well up in my eyes as my head began to spin crazily. _Just leave me alone… _"You're hurting me!"

_Anakin, you're breaking my heart! _

I gasped again as I sensed the raw _pain _in those unfamiliar words. "Breaking my heart?" I whispered in confusion. Where did all of these short-lived memories keep coming from? Why didn't I know anything yet?

I was shocked when Vader abruptly jerked away from me as if he were touching his lightsaber. "What did you say?" he breathed.

"I don't… I don't know. This is so _frustrating, _Vader," I said through clenched teeth as I stared down at my hands. "I can't _remember!_ Why can't I remember who I am?"

He was silent for a long moment. "This has been too early," he said finally. "You are still suffering from trauma from your injuries. I'll take you back to your quarters."

"No," I gasped. "I can't do this – I need answers. I'm going to go mad!"

Vader picked me up and began carrying me back to my room. "You need to calm yourself. Perhaps this is a blessing in disguise. This could be the chance for you to start a new, better life."

"But how will I know it's better if I don't know what my other life was like?" I demanded.

He had no answer.

* * *

Once we returned to my quarters, I pleaded, "Please, Vader, isn't there something I can do? Read? If I'm going to start over, I need to know what's out there."

He gazed at me, seeming wary and uncertain. "I'll have something brought to your room."

"Thank you," I nodded. When datapads and holos were brought to me, I instantly grabbed one and began devouring the information.

_The Jedi's attempt to assassinate Chancellor Palpatine failed, and thus the traitorous Jedi were found guilty of high treason and were eliminated as a threat from the galaxy. It was then that the great Empire began under the just rule of Emperor Palpatine, and his second-in-command, Darth Vader. _

Vader! Vader was the second most powerful man in the galaxy? But who were these Jedi? And why would they attempt to assassinate Palpatine? As I continued reading more, I discovered that the Jedi were once keepers of the peace, working under the Republic, but they had grown hungry for power and decided to therefore take over the galaxy. I suppose anything could be possible, but since they hadn't tried to take over the galaxy before for hundreds of years, why would they suddenly do so now?

I frowned. There were two sides to every story. I would like the whole picture, but these were all written by Imperialists. Well, maybe the Empire was better for the galaxy, I mused. After all, Lord Vader did save my life and take me in when he didn't have to. Perhaps the Jedi were really the bad guys.

Still… I couldn't ignore my deeper senses telling me something was slightly off. Call in intuition, but I just _knew _there was more to the story. I wondered, however, if Vader, being the head of the Empire, would allow me to see the other side.

But why wouldn't he? If the Empire were as just and good as all of these documents claimed, then I would have no trouble doing more research myself.

I continued reading about the new threat, miniscule but still a threat, to the Empire: The Rebel Alliance. Upon first hearing that name, I felt an odd twinge of delight and even pride, but I had no idea why. Dismissing the feelings, I went on to read that the Alliance had destroyed the Empire's protective defense system: the Death Star.

_Doesn't sound like a defensive system, _I thought. _Sounds more like a weapon. But why would they need that massive a weapon unless they had enemies? Maybe pirates? _

The whole thing seemed a bit skeptical to me, but I decided to keep these thoughts to myself for a time. I wanted to see what Vader was actually like before I made any judgments. Although, by the way he had treated me back in the training room, I was a little more wary of him. He seemed almost dangerous.

Still, he had rescued me. I owed him my life.

With a heavy sigh, I resumed my reading.

* * *

"This is Commander Skywalker reporting in," Luke announced over the com as his X-Wing and the _Millennium Falcon _soared into the Rebel fleet. "Requesting permission to land."

After a moment, Crix Madine greeted him. "Commander Skywalker, it's good to have you back. And with Captain Solo, I see. Well done."

"Don't sound so excited to see me," Han's voice dryly butted into the conversation. Luke smirked, knowing that Han and Madine didn't always see eye to eye on things.

"Captain Solo," Madine said, sounding slightly irritated. "I trust you're injured?"

"Sorry to disappoint," said Han cheekily. But his voice quickly turned serious as he said, "Any updates on Leia?"

"We'll talk about it inside," Madine said after a pause. "You're cleared to land in docking bay five." The com shut off, and Luke frowned.

Han said slowly, "Is it just me, or is anyone else having a bad feeling about this?"

"It's not just you, Han," Luke said grimly.

Once on board the head ship, Luke and Han, along with Lando and Chewie found the Rebel leaders in the conference room, all of them somber and grave. Han and Luke exchanged concerned glances at the looks on the leader's faces.

"What have you found out about Leia?" Han instantly demanded.

Mon Mothma replied calmly, "Nothing. Any trace of her has disappeared. We've searched all nearby planets, but we've found nothing."

"Then we obviously haven't searched hard enough," Han snarled.

"Captain, that's enough," Madine snapped. "We're already straining our resources as it is trying to locate the Princess. We know how important an asset she is, but right now we have more important things to worry about."

Han and Luke both stared at him in astonishment. "More important things?" Han said, his voice shaking with rage. Luke was also struggling to control his temper, and Chewie started to growl.

"Gentlemen, please," Mon Mothma said coolly. "The General didn't mean it that way. What he's saying is that although Princess Leia is a valuable member of the Rebellion, we're hearing reports of a new, deadly threat from the Empire. Reports of a new Death Star."

Han's jaw tightened. "What are you saying?" he demanded.

"You're going to just _forget _about Leia?" Luke added in shock.

"Of course not," Mothma objected, "But you have to understand that she is not our main priority at the moment. We have to think of the galaxy, Commander Skywalker. You, as a Jedi, should understand that sometimes sacrifices have to be made."

Luke felt another flash of anger. Who was this woman to tell him what Jedi were supposed to do? He resisted making a biting remark, determined to quench his anger and remain calm.

"Sacrifices, my - " Han stopped himself abruptly, breathing hard. "Leia would never do something like this. To any of you. She would've made sure that you were back, safe, no matter what. You don't deserve her," he said harshly, and Luke could see his eyes shining from unshed tears. He realized then how much Han loved Leia, and he felt a pang of sorrow for his best friend.

Luke stiffened and stared down the leaders coldly. "So we're just going to nothing about Leia?" he said. "Is this the final word?"

"Commander, you'd best watch your tone," Madine said sharply.

"No," Han growled, "Watch this. I'm outta here." He turned abruptly and started out the doorway, when Mothma said, startled, "Captain, what are you doing?"

Han turned, glaring at her. "I'm gonna go look for her. Try and stop me." He stormed out of the room.

Chewie snarled at the leaders and followed his friend out of the room. Once he was gone, an awkward silence descended upon the room until Lando said, "Forget this. I'm with him. Besides, someone's gotta look out for that pirate." He also walked out of the room.

Mothma turned her gaze to a grave Luke. "And you, Commander? Will you desert as well? Or will you do your duty as a Jedi and a Commander and stay with your men?"

Luke stared at her unflinchingly. "My duty is to my friends. To Leia. As for being a Commander, Wedge will understand completely. I'm sorry it has to be this way. But we haven't deserted you. You've deserted us. And Leia." He turned and left the room.

* * *

**So that's it for that chapter. For those of you who know me well, I really don't like Mon Mothma or Madine at all. Or Yoda. Or Mace. So basically all the top leaders of the good guy squad. Don't know why. **

**Review if you wish. Would make a really nice early Christmas present! :D **

**- Serena  
**


	7. Officer

**ALIVE**

**By Serena**

**A/N:** _Thanks for reading, guys!! Just to clear things up, everything in FIRST POV is LEIA - er, AISHA. ;D._

_Disclaimer: Don't own. I do own a lovely SW poster that I still have to hang up, though...  
_

* * *

**Three weeks.** Three long, confusing weeks, and although I had small flashbacks, I could only hear voices – I didn't see anyone. But I had been conversing with the mysterious yet kind Gon. I wasn't sure if he was someone from my past, or maybe a figment of my imagination, but he was the one thing I clung to as I attempted to regain my past.

I thought it strange that Vader was so forcefully against me trying to remember anything from my previous life. Every time I tried to bring up the subject, he'd sharply tell me to forget the past and start over.

But how could I forget something I didn't remember in the first place?

At the start of the first day of the fourth week, I slipped out of bed and padded to the large window, stared into space. My legs were mostly healed – scarred, but healed. In the fresher, I had discovered more scars – some on my back, my necks, and my torso. I wished that I knew where they from, but I didn't remember.

Space. Stars. The quiet serenity of the black vastness of the universe. So many planets, so many different people. The only time I felt at peace was when I stood like this, alone with my thoughts. I was free to think without Vader ordering me to move forward. It wasn't that I didn't like Vader – I did owe him my life – but I felt cold, strange whenever his presence was near.

I felt something terribly wrong whenever I looked into his gaping black mask. There was an emptiness there that made me shiver. I wondered what had happened to him to make him the way he was. I knew, somehow, that he had been through terrible tragedy and suffering. But I didn't want to ask what it was.

I let my eyes slip closed and drew myself into a deep meditative state.

_Aisha._

_Gon,_ I smiled. _How are you?_

_Very well, my dear. How are you faring? Your legs are well, I trust._

_Much better, thank you,_ I replied. _I didn't really need medical care. They healed much faster than the doctor said they would._

_Good,_ he replied. _I'm glad to hear it. I see you've been meditating. Your training is coming along well._

_Training with you, anyway. Vader's training is… quite different. I'm not sure I like it. _

He paused. _Why not? _

I gave a mental shrug. _It's just… darker. And it makes me use my anger – not that I don't have anger, but I feel out of control when I do his training. I don't like that. Maybe I'm a controlling person, I don't know. But I just… feel like I'm drifting off to somewhere I don't want to go. And he constantly keeps trying to make me forget my past._

_He's… afraid._

_Afraid of what? What could I possibly do to him? I'm not anyone important. I don't even know why he saved my life in the first place. _

I felt Gon drifting away from my mind, but before he left, he murmured, _You are more important than you know. Just don't forget who you are._

_But I don't KNOW who I am!_ I blurted out in frustration.

_You do, young one. You just need to discover that. _

I opened my eyes as his presence dissipated and sighed. Although usually a calming presence, his conversation left me more bereft and confused than before. It sounded almost as if he knew who I was before. But that was impossible… he'd said that he didn't know who I was.  
_  
Force, this is confusing._ I rubbed my forehead and ran a hand over my hair. This would be a lot easier if I knew who I was.

When the doorbell buzzed, I reached out to see whose presence stood at the door. I didn't feel Vader's dark, imposing presence, so I opened the door. To my surprise, Admiral Piett stood there, holding something in his hands. He smiled at me, but I sensed it was a false smile.

"Hello, Admiral," I greeted politely. Stepping aside, I said, "Won't you come in?"

He did, but he seemed very uncomfortable. "Miss Aisha. Lord Vader has charged me to give you these." He held out folded black clothes.

"Oh, Aisha is fine," I insisted, and took the clothes from him. They were a black shirt and black pants. The Admiral handed me a pair of tall black boots. I took them and smiled ruefully. "I guess I shouldn't have expected any other color from Lord Vader."

The Admiral smiled back slightly, but he looked surprised that I'd joked about Lord Vader. Curious, I decided to test my theory. "Do you like Lord Vader?" I asked suddenly.

Now he looked really scared. I didn't just feel the fear running off him – I saw it in his face, though he tried to disguise it behind indifference. "Lord Vader is… an efficient commanding officer."

"But do you like him? Is he a good man?" I pushed.

He paled. "He is… he is a demanding but good leader, Miss." He apparently ignored my wish for informalities.

That's not what I asked.

"Do his men like him?"

"They respect him," he answered truthfully.

I paused before slowly saying, "You're scared of him."

His eyes widened, and he started to stammer something in reply, but I cut him off by asking, "Why? What has he done?"

Piett looked away, clearly thinking of something to say that wouldn't get him in trouble. I tried to reassure him that this conversation wouldn't go beyond me and him, but he still remained hesitant. But finally, he said, "Lord Vader is not a… forgiving person, Miss Aisha."

I frowned and folded my arms over my chest. "What does that mean? Does he kill those under his command who fail him?"

His lack of reply only made me certain that Vader did, in fact, kill his subordinates. I sighed and shook my head. "Rest assured, Admiral, that these facts are safe with me. I'm just trying to understand Lord Vader more. For a man who saved my life, which puzzles me, he seems to be the kind of person who doesn't give out charity."

Piett swallowed and grew even whiter. "You were… a special case," he said in a faint voice.

I raised an eyebrow. "Really? Why's that? I was just a passenger on a ship attacked by pirates – that's what Vader told me. Why would he take me in when he doesn't even know me?"

Piett shook his head emphatically. "I don't know, Miss. Now, if you'll excuse me." He turned sharply and started out the door.

"Admiral, wait," I called after him.

He paused and turned, looking even more frightened than before. I walked up to him and held out a hand, smiling. "I hope to see you again soon." You seem like a decent man, I thought. Piett glanced down at my hand and took it for only a second, barely touching it before turning around and striding out the door.

I frowned at his behavior and his short, cryptic answers. If Vader had Piett so scared, if he killed his men for failing him, then why would he bother to save me? I was a nobody; and apparently Vader wasn't the man to dole out charity and kindness.

So why save me?

I picked up the black shirt that looked similar to Piett's officer uniform, only without the red and blue buttons, and felt a cold shiver of dread run down my spine.

Something was undoubtedly wrong.

I just didn't know what.

* * *

I stared at myself in the mirror. The black Imperial uniform fit me well, but the clothing was starchy and cold. I felt uncomfortable and out of place, but I wasn't exactly sure why. Although thankful to Vader for his generosity, I didn't like the color black - I preferred white. I didn't know why - it was clean, pure. Innocent.

I ran a brush through my short hair and sighed. I looked like a completely different woman from the woman that had just been saved from a horrible accident. My injuries were healed, the dark circles had left my face, and my eyes weren't as dull as they had been. I looked more like my name - more alive. But I didn't feel how I looked. I felt... strange. Wrong. Out of my element.

I felt like someone who had no idea who she was. And I didn't.

My heart sank, and I tried to bring myself out from my misery. But how could I be happy when I really didn't have anyone to help me? Vader was helping, but not in the way I wanted. He was cold, stern. Not warm and bright. Not like...

_Padme..._ a voice whispered.

My gaze darted around the room. "Hello?" I peered out into the main living area, but no one was there. Had I imagined the voice? No... I was certain I'd heard something.

I shook my head. Maybe I was going insane.

I jumped as the doorbell buzzed once more and went to answer it. I knew who it was before opening the door, and I straightened my shoulders and pushed the control. "Lord Vader," I greeted with a nod.

I could feel his eyes sweeping over my uniform. "Good. You're dressed. It suits you." His voice spoke in an indifferent tone, but I could feel his pleased emotions.

Frowning, I nodded. I didn't want to tell him that I thought the exact opposite. But he easily read my emotions and said, "You do not approve?"

"I..." I smiled ruefully. "I'm not one for black."

"Imperial officers either wear green or black," he replied simply. "But as you are my guest, you will wear black. And you are not an officer... yet. Only stormtroopers wear white."

"How about grey?" I asked.

He stood there, silent. "Perhaps." He stepped into the room, causing me to back into the room to allow him room to enter. "You're fully healed, I trust?"

"Yes," I said with a slight smile. "My legs have fully recovered, thanks to your training." I didn't mention how Gon had also helped with the meditation techniques, for fear that he'd grow angry as he had before.

"Excellent. And your lessons?"

"I've completed the first set you've given me," I informed him. "But I would like to read more about the people you're fighting... the Rebellion."

I felt a small jolt of fear from him, and I frowned in confusion. Why would he have to be afraid of me reading about the Rebellion? "Why," he asked carefully, "Would you like to read more about our about our enemies? I have given you all the information you need to know."

"But I want to know why they started - how," I protested. "I want to know who their leaders are, what their ideals are, why they're still continuing to fight the Empire. What are their goals? What kind of government would they have in place of the Empire?"

"The only thing you need to know," he snapped, "is that they are traitors to the Empire and need to be destroyed."

I stared at him, taken aback. I felt his temper raging, felt how furious and... afraid he was. Puzzled, I said slowly, "I'm not sure that's good enough. Shouldn't I try to learn everything I can? Maybe I can find a weakness, help defeat them. If I know more about them, the easier it will be to figure out a weakness, right? Isn't that how it goes? Study your opponent, learn his weaknesses?"

"A strategist at heart," he said in a dry tone, in an attempt to change the subject. "Perhaps you have found your calling, Aisha."

I shrugged half-heartedly. "I like politics and strategies. Don't know why. Maybe I was a politician before," I joked, but sobered quickly when I felt a rush of hate and fear from him. "What's wrong, Lord Vader? You seem... out of sorts."

"I am fine," he answered in a harsh voice. "But as you are ready, I have come to bring you to the command bridge. We are going to take a temporary pause from your lessons."

"What? Why?" My interest was piqued. "Are we going to have an official tour of the ship?"

He nodded slightly and said, "That, among other things."

"What other things?"

I froze - in astonishment or dread, I wasn't sure - when he replied, "You are going to begin training to become an officer in the Imperial Navy."

* * *

_Yep, it's another cliffee. _

_Hey, it's me! :D (couldn't resist, mate ;D)  
_

_Don't worry, I'll update sooner than before. Reviews are welcome - but you know that already. :)_

_**- Serena**  
_


	8. Panic

**ALIVE**

**By Serena**

**A/N: **Thanks for the reviews as always. Hope you all enjoy this chapter. It's pretty long for me.

* * *

_Training. Officer. Imperial Navy._

_Can you say Panic?_

_Oh, yes. I can scream Panic. _

I could only stare at him in shock. "I… what?"

"You have many talents, Aisha," Vader said. "Talents that should not be overlooked. You could become a great addition to the Empire, a valuable asset. Not only could you become my apprentice, but you could rise through the ranks quicker than most officers and eventually become an admiral."

"But… I… I'm not sure that I can… do that," I stammered, rubbing the back of my neck. "I mean, I'm still recovering, and I don't know much about the Imperial Navy…"

"You will learn," he said. "And I will help you. You have great potential, Aisha. Now you just need to use it."

I bit my lip and looked away. "Could I think about it?"

"Yes." He turned towards the door. "You may have the rest of the day to think about it."

"The day!" I exclaimed. "I need more time than that."

His helmet swiveled to face me; and I felt annoyance and impatience radiating from him. "Time is short," he said. "Events are in motion – you need to decide soon." He paused. "Let me know when you have chosen."

"What's the other option?" I asked, hesitant.

He studied me, thinking about it for a moment. "There are other choices," he said. "You could become my private agent – working solely for me. Or you could be an assassin."

I didn't like that last one at all.

"You could be a pilot as well," he continued. For some reason, I sensed that he was inclined towards this one. "But then, that is in the Imperial Navy. So you have a choice, Aisha. Become an officer and work under the Empire. Become an agent and work for me."

I remained silent, weighing my choices. Either way, it didn't look like I would be getting away from Vader or this ship anytime soon. But I didn't mind Vader – he wasn't that bad – at least, towards me, anyway. And what else would I do? This galaxy was huge, and I knew no one, remembered nothing. My only connection was Vader.

"I'll think about it," I said finally.

"Good. Now come. I will show you around the ship. And then maybe you will get an idea of what you wish to do." He motioned for me to follow him, and we left the room together.

* * *

"According to the ship's trajectory, it must've crashed somewhere around here," Luke said into his comlink. Artoo beeped in confirmation of that fact.

On the _Millennium Falcon_, Han sighed and rubbed his chin. "Yeah, but that's just it, kid. I don't see anything at all. The ship's not here."

Artoo beeped again, and Threepio, also on the _Falcon_ with Han and Chewie, said, "Artoo says that he's picking up traces of scrap metal a few hundred kilometers ahead. I'm afraid the metal matches that of the ship Princess Leia was on at the time."

Han felt a pang in his chest. "Is there any sign of what might've happened to them?" he asked the droid.

Luke said through the comlink, "I've picked up some trace blaster fire. I think… I think this was a battle, Han."

Han felt like swearing but refrained from doing so. Chewie moaned, and Han glared at him. "Hey, let's try to be optimistic, all right? We don't know if she's dead. They could've escaped in pods and gone to a nearby system. Right?" He glanced at Threepio.

"Oh, yes, Captain, that would be a reasonable explanation. But I must also add that if Princess Leia's ship had been destroyed, there would be much more debris. And yet, there isn't much here."

Han frowned. "Ya know, Goldenrod's right, Luke," he said to the younger man. "Let's say Leia was attacked – we would see parts of ship if it had been destroyed."

"Yeah, I agree. But what does this mean, then?" Luke asked. "I can't pick up any trail from the ship's ionic signature. They didn't go any farther than this point. Unless… wait a minute. I am picking up another ship's trail. And it's…" He paused. "Oh, no… oh, _no_…"

"What?" Han demanded. "What is it?"

"Han… the other ship was an Imperial vessel."

Han felt his stomach drop. "No. Please tell me you're joking."

"I wish I were, Han," Luke moaned.

"But that means…" Han didn't want to finish the sentence.

"It means she's been captured."

Han swallowed and glared at the window in front of him. Chewie snarled something, causing Han to nod in agreement. "Yeah, you said it, buddy. So what do we do now, kid? Go after the ship?"

Luke made a frustrated noise. "There's no way to track it, though. It went into hyperspace right here, so I have no idea where they went."

"Damn it!" Han swore, slamming a fist on the dashboard. Chewie whined and covered his face with a hairy paw. "Luke, I'm not letting her go! I won't let those –those sithspawns have her!"

"You know I feel the same way," Luke told him firmly. "We're going to find her, Han. I promise. We'll start by looking at nearby systems, see if we can find out anything. I would suggest we split up to cover more ground, but-"

"No," Han objected. "If we're going up against the Imps, we'd better stick together. We'll have a better chance of finding her if we pool our resources together, right?"

"Yeah, you make a good point." Luke's voice sobered. "Han. We will find her. I'm not giving up on her like the rest of the Alliance did."

Han's jaw clenched at the mention of the Alliance. "I thought I had them figured out, kid," he said, his voice hard. "I thought that they were the good guys. And then they had to go and pull somethin' like this."

"I know," Luke said in a grim tone. "They let us down. They let Leia down, more importantly. After all she did for them, they abandoned her. But we're not going to do that. So, let's look at the nearby systems and see what we can do."

"Right," Han replied, pulling up a star chart on the front computer. "Well, it's not like we're in the Core," he said. "We're in Outer Rim territory. This might take a while." He ran a hand through his hair and sighed, staring out into space.

Luke said after a moment, "Han, wait. I've picked up another ion trail. It's not the Empire or Leia's ship – it came from somewhere else. And they didn't go into hyperspace. They left a trail."

Han frowned. "Let me get this straight. Three trails – one an Imp, one Leia's ship, and another unknown. There was a battle here – but who was fighting if there were three different ships?"

"I'm not sure. I think our best bet right now will be to follow the unknown ship, see if we can get some answers from them. There's a moon not far from here – populated mostly by smugglers and pirates, it looks like. You'll fit right in, Han." His voice adapted a wry tone.

"Yeah, yeah," grumbled Han. "We'll head there."

"Oh, dear!" cried Threepio. "Pirates! Forgive me, Master Luke, but it sounds incredibly dangerous!"

"Yeah," snarled Han, wheeling on him, "And I'm one of those pirates, so that makes me even more dangerous right now. So shut up or shut down, got it?"

"Oh, dear!" Threepio exclaimed in horror.

Luke said in a calming voice, "Threepio, don't worry. You'll stay and protect the ship. The rest of us will go off-ship and look for answers. All right?"

"Yes, Master Luke. Good idea. I shall stay here." The droid sounded satisfied.

Han shook his head and plugged in the coordinates. "All right, jumping to hyperspace in three… two… one." And he and Luke's X-Wing jumped together into hyperspace. Rubbing his chin, Han remembered Luke's words.

We'll find her, Han. I promise.

"Yeah, I hope so, kid," Han muttered.

_Oh, sweetheart… I hope you're all right. _

For the first time in his life, Han Solo felt absolute despair.

* * *

The Imperial Star Destroyer Executor was impressive, I had to admit. Huge and powerful, it was definitely one of the grandest flagships I'd ever seen. Not that I remembered seeing any other ships except this one and the one Vader found me on, however.

Walking slowly beside Vader, I found that I sensed much hostility towards me from the other men on board. I didn't know why; and when I asked Vader, he merely replied that they did not care for newcomers, especially women.

"But you are in my charge now," he added. "They will not dare to speak to you in a disrespectful way."

I looked up at him. "I think they're afraid of you," I remarked quietly.

He didn't look at me, but I felt curiosity from him. "And why do you think that, Aisha? Are your senses attuned to their emotions?"

"At the moment," I said, "My senses are attuned towards everything. I can sense your feelings, and the feelings of every other man on this ship when they come near me."

Vader halted and looked at me. After a minute of scrutiny, which made me uncomfortable, he said, "You are indeed growing in your power, Aisha. Soon, you will be able to do many more things than sense other people's emotions."

"Like what?" I asked, curious, and yet afraid at the same time. I didn't really want to be feared in the same way that Vader was. Respected, yes. Feared, no.

"I will show you," he replied.

Swallowing back another wave of nervousness, I thought, _But I don't want to feel that power. I don't want to feel the anger, the rage that you do._ I shuddered involuntarily, and Vader glanced at me.

"Are you cold?"

"A little," I muttered, wrapping my arms around my too-thin form. I hadn't been eating well – most food didn't want to stay down. It went hand in hand with the nightmares I'd been having ever since I'd come onto the ship.

I saw, felt Vader's gloved hand reach out toward me, but he pulled away just before reaching my shoulder. "We will be reaching the storage center soon," he said in a detached, monotonous voice. "You may get a jacket from there."

"I don't know why I'm cold," I lied. "But I'll be fine."

_Space is cold, Ani. _

Blinking, I halted. _What?_ I wondered. That voice… I'd heard that voice before. A female's voice. A kind, sweet voice that warmed me to my toes. A motherly voice.

"Aisha?" Vader had stopped and was studying me closely. "What is it?"

I shook my head and continued forward, confused. "I don't know. Another flashback, I think."

"Of what?"

I bit my lip and confessed, "I don't know. It's a woman's voice. I've heard it before."

His pace slowed, and I detected a hint of nervousness in his emotions. "What did she say?" he rumbled.

"Different things. Just now I heard her say something about space being cold." For some reason, I was hesitant to tell him about the mystery lady voice; but he seemed keen on knowing about it.

But now I felt a wave of pain, agony, and suffering from Vader, something that made me halt in my tracks. "What is it?" I asked. "Vader, what's the matter?"

"Nothing," he growled, and began to stride faster down the hall. I had to jog to catch up with his large step.

"It must be something," I insisted. "What did I say?"

"Nothing!" he barked. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Talk about what?" I demanded, confused. "Vader, what's going on?"

He swerved on me and hissed, "I said nothing. Return to your room."

"But-"

"Go!" He boomed, pointing in the opposite direction.

I scowled, feeling a warm lick of flaming anger rise up in me. "I didn't do anything wrong!" I snapped. "And I'm not some child that you can order around!"

"You are overstepping your bounds, Aisha," Vader snarled, advancing towards me.

"No, I'm not," I said, furious. "You can't order me around like this. It's not like I'm your daughter!"

He froze, much to my astonishment. Without another word, he suddenly turned and strode down the corridor, leaving me in much bewilderment and anger.  
_  
What was that about? _

I turned away and started to walk back the way I had come. But I soon realized that I had no idea where I was at this point; and I wasn't about to run back to Vader for directions. Feeling helpless, I tried to talk to someone, but no one would answer me. The men either ignored me or shot me nasty looks and pushed past me. Inside, I was almost to the point of tears, but I wouldn't show my frustration. Instead, holding my head high, I walked down the corridor, decidedly ignoring the vicious glares I was receiving.

I felt like a hopeless case as I wandered around the ship. I was about to burst into tears, and I sank against the wall of a mostly emptied corridor, when I heard a familiar voice say my name.

Looking up, I saw Admiral Piett standing in front of me, eyeing me with concern and curiosity. "Miss Aisha, are you all right?"

"Oh, thank goodness!" I moaned, and instinctively fell forward and wrapped my arms around his neck in a tight hug. "I thought I'd never get any help!"

The Admiral froze. "Miss," he started hesitantly. "Miss Aisha..." He started to gently tug me away.

I pulled back, resisting the urge to sniffle. "I'm sorry, Admiral, but Vader deserted me for some strange reason, and I've been lost in these corridors ever since. I need to get back to my room - would you mind showing me the way back?"

He gave me a small smile. "Of course not, Miss Aisha. Come, this way." He patted my back in a comforting way and led me back to my room. On the way, he asked, hesitant, "If you don't mind me asking, Miss Aisha... why would Lord Vader desert you?"

I sighed. "I don't know. I think I might've said something to upset him. But we were fine, and then he started acting very strangely. I'll have to talk with him tomorrow." I rubbed my face. "I have to talk with him anyway... he's told me that he wants me to be an officer in the Imperial Navy."

Piett did a double take and stared at me, obviously astonished. "He... he did?" stammered the Admiral. "But why in the Emperor's name..." He trailed off and shook his head in disbelief. "I... well..." He started forward again. "What do you think about this?"

"I don't know," I admitted. "It's a big commitment - and so early, too. How can I be an officer, leading all of these men when I don't even know who I am? Or how to lead?"

"So you have no memory," Piett said carefully.

"No, not really. I have flashbacks - just voices, generally. But it's gone in a second." I looked down, feeling depressed. "I don't know if I'll ever get it back."

"I'm sure you will." But he didn't sound that sure at all. Still, I was grateful that was at least trying to make me feel better. We stopped at my door, much to my relief. "Well, here you are, Your - Miss Aisha." He reddened, embarrassed for some reason.

I nodded and smiled at him. "Thank you, Admiral." I reached out and squeezed his hand. "Thank you for everything. I hope we can talk more."

"Yes, well... have a good evening," he stuttered, giving me a small, careful smile.

"Thank you. You-" I halted.

_Oh, sweetheart… I hope you're all right. _

That voice... I'd heard that voice before. That same warm, deep voice that haunted my dreams and my thoughts.

"...too." I finished the sentence, not really looking at Piett, but focusing on that voice - the lost memory of the voice that had once again flashed into my brain. Who was this voice? This voice that made my blood sing with warm, unfamiliar feelings?

"Aisha?" Piett regarded me curiously. "Are you all right?"

I blinked and glanced up at him. "Another flashback. I just had another flashback. At least, I think it was." I frowned, biting my lip. "But now it's gone." I sighed again and smiled sadly. "Well, thanks again."

"You're welcome. And do get some rest, Miss Aisha. You look rather pale."

Nodding, I entered my room, and the door closed behind me. I leaned against the door, breathing deeply.

"Who are you?" I whispered to my empty room.

But I received no answer.

* * *

_Reviews are always appreciated - let met know what you think! _

_- Serena_


	9. Jix

**ALIVE**

**By Serena**

**A/N: **Thanks for the reviews as always. Hope you all enjoy this chapter! :)

_This chapter is dedicated to Liam Neeson, who just lost his beloved wife Natasha Richardson. My heart is broken for them. _

* * *

That night, I had another dream about the mysterious Gon. Frustrated and confused, I poured out all of my fears on him, ranting and raving. "I feel so lost," I admitted with unwanted tears in my eyes. "I don't know what to do… or where to go… or who to trust. Vader wants me to be an Imperial officer, but how can I lead men when I don't even know myself?"

Gon put a comforting, warm hand on my shoulder in a tender motion. I swiped a sleeve under my nose rather ungracefully and then wiped the tears now dripping out of my eyes.

"Young one, everything is going to be all right," he soothed. "You do know yourself. Trust your own instincts. And trust in the Force to guide you."

"How can I trust something that I don't even understand?" I sobbed into his warm cloak. "Vader is trying to teach me about it, but he makes me feel so cold and hateful… then the next minute, I get these warm feelings from him. I don't know what to do, Gon. Tell me what to do."

He squeezed my shoulder and put his other arm around me. For some reason, I was reminded of a father's embrace. But whose?

"Young one," he rumbled, his voice vibrating deeply, "The Force has a light side and a dark side. Unfortunately, Vader is encased in the dark. But you must stay in the light, young one. I know you can. I will be here to help you. Do you trust me?" He pulled back to gaze down at me searchingly.

Slowly, I nodded. "Yes, I do."

He smiled. "Then come. We'll start your lessons with a simple meditation."

By the time I woke up, I felt more at peace than I could remember. I was alone, cold, and in the dark, but for some reason, it didn't bother me as much.

I could do this. I would do this.

Slipping out of bed, I went into the bathroom, took a quick shower, and ran a brush through my short hair that now bobbed slightly towards the front of my face. After that, I padded into the central living area and stared at the uniforms that had been laid out for me. One was that of an Imperial officer, the other was a black jumpsuit accompanied with tall black boots.

Vader was showing the choices – work for the Navy… or work for him.

After a momentary thoughtful pause, I sucked in a deep breath, chose the one that I knew would be best, and left the room to find Vader. Wracking my brain, I managed to remember the way to the bridge, where I immediately searched for Vader or Admiral Piett, the only person I could trust besides Vader. But unfortunately, I didn't see him there; and the other officers were now really staring at me.

This was a mistake.

I turned to leave, feeling awkward and frowned upon, but when a man said, "My lady", I turned. A taller man with an impassive face strode up to me, hands behind his back.

"You were looking for Lord Vader, I assume?"

"Yes," I answered quickly.

"He's in a private meeting right now with the Admiral," the man said. "I've just been summoned right now."

"Oh. Is this a bad time? I'll just talk to him later," I assured him.

His lips twitched ever so slightly upward. "As a matter of fact, my lady, Lord Vader has asked for you himself."

Of course. He must've known somehow that I was looking for him.

I jumped a bit when I heard Vader's deep baritone in my head: _Indeed I did, Aisha. Follow the general, and he'll bring you to me. I believe we have much to discuss. _

_Yes, we do_, I said, feeling suddenly nervous.

Oddly enough, I felt a touch of concern emanating from him. _Are you… all right? _

I didn't know why, but my heart warmed at the question. _Yes, I'm fine. For now._

"Miss?" the man was staring at me strangely, and I blinked.

"You… are the general?" I asked.

"General Maximillian Veers, my lady." He nodded shortly. "Now we mustn't keep Lord Vader waiting. He is not a patient man." Without another word, he hurried down the corridor, causing me to break into a jog to keep up with him.

"How long have you been working for Vader, General?" I questioned conversationally as we strode down the corridors.

"A while now, miss."

"Is he… a good leader?"

"He is... efficient," he said.

"Is he a good man?"

Veers frowned. "May I ask the reason for these questions, miss?"

_Why is he so hesitant? _

"I'm merely curious, General," I replied, watching him carefully.

Veers suddenly halted and pressed the door lock on the side of the door. The doors slid open, revealing a large room with a round table surrounded by mostly empty chairs. However, the first things I noticed as I stepped in behind Veers were that two men sat in chairs – one was Admiral Piett.

The other looked, I had to say it, like a vagabond. His boots were up on the table, his position relaxed, with his arms resting casually behind his head. His hair, long and pulled into a ponytail, was dark tinted with silver, but his rugged face didn't look older than thirty-five. His clothing was less than standard – it was merely a brown vest that didn't cover much of his broad, muscular chest, light brown cargos, and thick leather gloves. His eyes were closed, but when the opened lazily, I saw two bright blue orbs appear. They blinked, focused, and stared sharply at me.

Then, his relaxed position straightened, and now looking wide awake, he proceeded to watch my every move as I stood beside Veers.

_Stop staring at me_, I thought, annoyed. He was very good-looking, I had to admit; someone I could maybe go for if I weren't so unsure of myself.

Vader stood somewhere in between Piett and the mysterious man. And for some reason, he seemed agitated. When we came in, he turned to us. "General Veers. Aisha." When I felt another hint of warmness, I almost smiled.

Vader was seemingly in a good mood today.

"Jixton," Vader suddenly snapped, glancing down at the stranger. "Boots off the table. Now."

All right… so he was in a good mood toward _me_ today.

The stranger, apparently named Jixton, grinned lazily and slowly, childishly dragged his feet off the table. "Sure thing, Uncle Dee." Shooting me a smirk, he leaned back once more.

_Uncle Dee? Vader has a relation? _

To my surprise, Veers let out a big sigh and took a seat at the table. Unsure of what to do, I went over and sat next to Piett, staring across at Jixton. Piett, upon seeing me, glanced at me with a small smile. I returned it and looked at Vader.

"Lovely to see you're back, Jixton," Veers said dryly.

"Isn't it, though?" Jixton replied arrogantly. "So, what's with the chick?" He nodded to me.

Vader turned on him, and I just knew that he was glaring furiously at him. But I had a furious glare of my own for the man.

"Call me 'chick' again, Mr. Jixton," I told him in a dangerous and sharp tone, "And I'll personally make sure that you won't ever be having children."

While Vader and the two officers stared at me in disbelief, Jixton let out a burst of laughter. "Spicy thing, ain't ya?"

"You're asking for it, you piece of scum," I snapped, eyes narrowing.  
_  
Where is this coming from? _

But Jixton only grinned wider. "You know it, babe."

"You dirty, rotten scoundrel!" I hissed, severely irritated by this man's gall. But for some reason, I was actually rather enjoying our conversation.

_Scoundrel? Scoundrel? I like the sound of that. _

I blinked as a rush of familiar – and unfamiliar emotions bloomed inside me, and I inhaled sharply at the feeling that made me breathless and almost euphoric at the same time. My eyes threatening to flutter shut, a myriad of images flashed in my vision.

_Bodies close. Warmth._

Hands touching. Electricity.

Lips caressing. Flame.

Feelings blossoming. Love.

Stang. 

In a whoosh, it was gone, leaving me feeling cold and bereft a mere second later. But that voice – it kept coming back, louder and clearer each time. But that didn't help the fact that I didn't know who it was.

_Why can't I remember?_ I thought, pained. _Why don't I know who you are? _

"You're a spitfire," Jixton laughed, reeling me in back to the present moment.

"You're an idiot," I replied wryly.

"Jixton, that is enough," Vader growled, pointing a gloved finger at him warningly. I sensed another emotion radiating off him. Protectiveness. I'd felt it a few times before from Vader, but this one almost felt like a paternal concern.

Almost a… fatherly concern.

Looking to me, Vader said, "This is Sergeant Wrenga Jixton."

"Call me Jix," Jixton said amiably.

"Absolutely, you brainless bantha," I said with a perfectly serene face. Beside me, I heard Piett cough into his hand to hide a laugh and a smile. Veers merely raised an eyebrow.

"And this is Aisha," Vader said, now sounding a bit amused at my antics. "She is under my charge, Jixton."

"Ooh, peachy," Jix exclaimed, rubbing his gloved hands together. "A new addition to the family." Grinning mischievously at me, he said, "I guess that makes us cousins, huh?"

"You're delusional," I said.

Jix just laughed again. "I like her already, Uncle D. She's just like you - has your charming temper."

"That is enough, Jixton!" Vader growled in a dark tone. But I not only detected anger from him – I sensed a bit of fear as well, which I found curious. What would he have to be afraid of? If anyone, Jix would have reason to be afraid. Vader's patience, I saw, was quickly waning. "I did not come to hear you two bicker like children."

"Hey, if the shoe fits," I broke in.

"You're one to talk," Jix shot back.

I gave him a pitying look and a slow smile. "Yes, I can certainly talk, but at least I can form actual sentences."

Jix's eyes narrowed, but Vader interrupted him before he could say anything in return. "General, Admiral, Jixton has just returned from a mission on Cortec. It appears that the Moff there is not paying the Empire tribute – instead, he is lending money to the enemy. That is our next course."

"Sir," Veers said, shooting me a sideways glance. "What about the prisoner in our holding cell?"

"He knows nothing," Vader rumbled. "It appears that the ship was merely a transport vessel. He is not connected with the Rebellion."

"Then perhaps we should seek… other sources," Veers said.  
_  
Why do I get the feeling that I'm missing something important here?_ I thought suspiciously as I studied Veers carefully. Nothing seemed out of place just while looking at him, and he wasn't staring at me, but something didn't feel right about his tone.

"There are no other sources, general," Vader told him. Again, a hint of warning rang across through clearly in his voice. "Not so far, at least. But continue your search. There may be other vessels nearby."

"Right away, sir." The general nodded obediently and rose to his feet. "Admiral." He nodded to Piett, shot a dry look to Jix, and then lastly gave me a long, strange glance before hurrying out of the room.

I sat back in my seat, biting my lip pensively. _That was odd. _

After he left, Vader gave some orders to Piett, who shot me another small smile before leaving himself. When the door shut behind him, Vader turned to me and appraised me, pleased.

"So, Aisha," Vader said. "You have made a decision."

I nodded, swallowing. "I have. And I think you already know the answer."

"Yes. You have made a wise choice," he rumbled. "I have a feeling you will do well as my personal agent."

Glancing at Jix, who looked perfectly at ease, I asked, "Why is he still here? Is he… really your nephew?"

Vader scoffed. "Hardly. Jixton here is another agent of mine. More brawn than brains, I'm afraid."

"Hey! I resent that!" Jix said, frowning up at the dark lord.

"You mean you resemble that," I said with a quirky smile. "Try to keep up, Jixton, even though I know it will be hard for you."

Jix glared at me. "Ya know, if I didn't know any better, I'd definitely say you two were really related. It's eerie how much your personalities are alike. And scary."

"Indeed," said Vader in a low voice. Turning to me again, he continued, "Aisha, I have decided that Jixton will assist you in readying yourself for future missions. Despite his lack of respect for his superiors, he does have experience in the field."

"Training? From him?" I said, frowning.

Jix grinned. "That's right, coz. You'll be takin' orders from your ol' cousin Jix."

"She will take orders from me, Jixton," Vader corrected. "As do you."

"But…" I didn't want to say it in front of Jix. Mentally I sent: What about you training me? Was he going to give that up?

We will still continue, Aisha, Vader assured me. Jix will only give you training in other areas. But your training with me is the most vital. Do you understand?

All right, I said uncertainly. I was not entirely sure how I felt about that yet. I certainly didn't want a repeat of last time's episode.

Vader glanced down at Jix and said, "I will leave you two to get started. Do not aggravate me again, Jixton." I heard a hidden warning in his voice that caused Jix to nod in obedience. Once he'd left the room, his cloak sweeping behind him, Jix looked at me and grinned.

"You hungry?"

I couldn't help but smile back. "Famished."

For the first time since my accident, I felt things were looking up.

For now, at least.

* * *

_Reviews are always appreciated - let me know what you think! _

_- Serena_


	10. Practice

**ALIVE**

**By Serena**

**A/N**: _Yep, no updates for a while - sorry about that. I have too many stories going at once. Sowwy. :D  


* * *

_

"So, what's the deal with you, huh?" Jix asked as the droid set platters of food on the table in front of us.

"What do you mean?" I said, picking up some food and putting it on my plate. I didn't notice the sudden silence until I looked up to see Jix watching me carefully. "What?"

"You eat like a lady."

"Well, I should hope so," I said, confused.

He fixed me with a scrutinizing gaze. "No, I mean you eat like you're royalty. The way you handle the food and your utensils."

I blinked. "I didn't notice."

He shrugged. "Never mind. So, how'd you get here?"

"An accident," I said, looking down at my food.

_Screams. Blood running down my face. Pain. Fear. _

I shuddered. "My ship was attacked. During the confusion, I had an accident… and now I can't remember anything before that."

Jix sat up straighter and stared at me. "You're serious."

"Yeah."

_I wish I weren't. _

"You have… amnesia? For real?"

"Yes, for real."

"So you don't remember nothin'… before the attack."

"I don't remember _anything,_" I corrected, cutting my food up into pieces. "That's correct. I didn't even know that I _was _attacked until Vader told me." Glancing up at him, I said, "Speaking of Vader, why do you call him 'Uncle Dee'?"

He shrugged. "Codename for missions. Just stuck, I guess."

Curious, I said, "How long have you known him?"

Jix shrugged again and stuffed some food into his mouth. "Dunno. A few years. Ten? Five? Been a while."

"Do you… like him?"

He let out a bark of laughter and shook his head.

"What's so funny?" I asked, annoyed.

"Coz, there's one thing you need to know about Vader. He's not a nice guy. In fact, I'm one of the only people in the kriffing galaxy he can take for more than ten minutes, and even I push it, I know. You do one little thing wrong, and snap – you're gone."

I stared at him in horror. "He… he _murders _people? Just because they do something he doesn't like?"

Jix froze mid-chew and swallowed. For some reason, I sensed dread fill him – as if he'd just told something he wasn't supposed to. "Well, uh," he stammered. "Vader just cuts 'em loose," he hastily added, stuffing more food into his mouth. "He just… he's not a guy to suffer fools, know what I mean?"

"I'm sure I don't," I said, my mind spinning. "What if I do something wrong? Will he kill me, too?"

Jix said, "Look, coz, Vader only gets rid of the guys that deserve it. More than half the officers are here because they know a guy. Most of 'em don't deserve to be here – and they mess up big time, lose a lot of men for no good reason."

"Oh."

"But trust me, coz. He won't hurt you."

I looked down at my plate and wondered just how little I really knew about Darth Vader.

"So, anyway," Jix spoke, "How long you been here?"

"A few weeks," I said. "Vader's been looking after me."

"You know any self-defense? Know how to handle a blaster?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe. I don't remember." My hand clenched on my fork.

Jix looked at me, sympathetic for the first time. "Don't worry about it. A few weeks with me and you'll be set. Promise. I used to teach back at the Academy on Carida. I've been doin' this stuff for years – you're in good hands." He threw me a smile.

"Let's hope so," I said with a small smirk. "When do we start?"

"Whenever you feel like it," he said lazily, leaning back in his seat. "You all right from that accident?"

"I had problems with my legs," I informed him. "But they're fine now. I'm actually feeling better, so I'm ready to start when you are."

"Good," he said, nodding in satisfaction. "We'll get started right away, then. We'll work on your defense moves then move to higher-level stuff. Eventually, you'll be able to infiltrate a palace and do your thing."

"You mean kill someone?" I demanded sharply.

He shrugged. "Dunno. Whatever Vader has you do. But he saves yours truly for the more dirty work. Getting rid of corrupted officials, that kinda thing. I think you might be more of a recon girl. Stealth, probably."

"Oh, good," I said, trying to hide my relief. "I don't want to be an assassin."

He took another bite of food. "Don't worry about stuff like that this early in the game. First we gotta see how you can hold up against basic training. See if you got any real learnin' at all."

I pushed away my plate and inhaled deeply. "Let's get started, then."

* * *

"We'll start out with simple target practice," Jix told me as we entered a private training center. Moving up to a long glass case hanging on the wall, filled with guns, he opened it and inspected the different blasters. I came up beside him and stared at one particularly large rifle.

"That'll be a sniper rifle," Jix said. "Used primarily for assassins." He sounded amused, and his eyes gleamed at me as he gave me a smirk.

I quickly switched my gaze to a small blaster pistol.

"Here." Jix pulled a pistol off the wall and tossed it to me. I fumbled with it clumsily before dropping it on the floor. Jix raised an eyebrow; and I blushed and quickly picked up the gun.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"Coz, you'd better be a better shot than you are a catcher," Jix quipped as he activated the targets. "Because if you ain't, I don't see what Uncle Dee's gonna do with you."

I swallowed and looked at the floor.

_How can I do this? _

But when a finger tilted my chin up, I looked up through depressed eyes to see Jix gazing down at me sympathetically. "Hey, chin up, coz. That's what I'm here for." He gave me a friendly fist to the shoulder and stood back. "Now, we'll start out easy. Ten feet. Hit the target." He motioned to the target in front of me. "It ain't even moving, so this should be easy."

I nodded hesitantly and moved up to the target. I pointed my blaster at the target, narrowed my eyes, and shot.

_Blam! _

The shot hit the target directly.

I stared at the target, then to Jix, who looked pleasantly surprised. "All right," he said with a half grin. "Beginner's luck. Let's give you something a bit harder. Back up five feet."

I did as he asked, aimed at the target, let out a deep breath, and focused all my attention on the target.

_Blam! Blam!_

Both shots hit the target in the _dead _center. My mouth fell open slightly as a burst of exhilaration shot through me.

_Whoa. _

I glanced at Jix, who frowned. "All right," he said, a bit more skeptical. "Not bad."

"Not bad!" I protested. "That was perfect!"

"Yeah, well, try shooting from another ten feet back, and then we'll see how you do," Jix said.

I stepped back and fired again. The shot hit the center once more.

"What about that?" I demanded. "Beginner's luck?"

"Exactly."

My jaw dropped. "What? You can't call that luck! In my experience, there's no such thing as luck." I suddenly felt odd after saying that but shook it off and blinked.

"Right," Jix grinned. "Sorry if I'm brusin' your precious ego."

"Ego?!"

Now he laughed. "Musta hit pretty close to get you all riled up like that, huh, coz?" Jix teased.

_What? _

A wave of anger, frustration, and _warmth _spread throughout my body; and I inhaled sharply as my eyelids fluttered shut. My fingers trembled; and before I could control myself, the gun slipped from my hands and landed with a clunk onto the floor. I stumbled back uncertainly as my vision grew muddled. Voices murmured in the back of my head – and blurry figures moved around in my sight.

One was tall and brown… the other sitting in a bed, dressed in white. And the last… he was clearer than the others. Yes, it was a he. He was tall… dressed in navy, white, and black…

And his voice… his _voice! _

_Musta hit pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up like that, huh, kid? _He bent over the person in the bed.

Why couldn't I see his _face?_

Before I knew it, my legs filled with pain, and I collapsed to the floor. But two strong arms caught me as I fell and gently lowered me to the ground. As I dizzily opened my eyes, I looked up into Jix's concerned gaze.

"Hey, coz! Aisha! You all right?"

"What?" I murmured. "Yeah… I'm fine."

He snorted. "Sure you are."

"Just a little… dizzy…"

Picking me up, he rose to his feet and strode out of the training center. "No, you ain't. I'm takin' you back to your room. You need to rest."

"No… fine…"

"Don't argue, coz. You need some sleep. We'll pick up with this tomorrow. But Uncle Dee won't want a fainting agent. You had a bad accident – people like you go into shock and take a while to recover." He entered my dark quarters and gently set me on my bed.

The last thing I remembered was his warm, calloused hand smoothing over my forehead before I surrendered to unconsciousness.

* * *

_She's gettin' more memories... hehehe!! No Gang in this one, but they'll probably be in the next chapter. :) _

_- Serena  
_


End file.
